Goodbye LJ...

[windandwater]

This is just to make it official for those who don't know, but I'm leaving LJ completely. For the rest of this week at least. Tomorrow is the Bar Exam and it runs for three days, so don't expect to see me about at all until Thursday night. Or even until the weekend since I plan on spending Thursday after the Bar drunk and crying. No online time for me at all. *whines* It will be hard, but I know I can do it.

So, because I'm a total h0r like that, I am declaring this to be a spam post. Go ahead. Run wild! Give me fics, give me links, give me pics, just babble to your heart's content and rape my inbox so I have something to see when I finally DO come back to the wonderful world of LJ. I don't even care if you write me a drabble and post it one word at a time. XD;

Though, I've tried to make a spam post before and it failed a bit miserably, so I don't have very high expectations this time around. Feel free to prove me wrong though!

♥

Comments

Re: Spoil of War, book 2

[mikkeneko.livejournal.com]

“I can’t!” Duo shuddered, and covered his face in his hands. “I only w-wanted to touch you... to feel you... but I c-can’t! Every time I feel like I... like I want something, then I’m just so afraid -- I can’t stop it! I’m sorry, Heero! It isn’t you, it’s not you at all, I swear... but I can feel them, still t-touching me, and I can’t stop them... I can’t control it, I’m sorry...”

“Just...” Heero took a breath; he could feel the edge of pleading creep into his voice. “Just tell me what to do, Duo. I don’t want to hurt you any more. What should I do?”

There was silence for a long moment, broken only by the gulping breaths as Duo fought to regain his composure. At last, he stirred and looked up at Heero, eyes wide and imploring and cheeks streaked with tears. “Just hold me?” he asked in a small voice.

“You’re sure?” Heero hesitated, though his arms yearned for Duo. The other boy swallowed once and nodded.

“I’m okay now. I just want you to hold me. That’s all,” he whispered, and Heero needed no further urging, sliding down the bedding to take Duo in his arms. Duo sighed and relaxed against him, and didn’t resist at all when Heero pulled them both backwards to lay down on the bed, Duo nestled securely in his arms.

He dared to reach up and stroke Duo’s hair, keeping his touch as non-threatening as he possibly could. His mind whirled with dark thoughts, longing for revenge that was far out of his grasp.

After a time, Duo stirred and whispered, “Are you angry?”

Heero blinked in the dimness, and his hand stilled. “Yes.” He felt Duo tensing, preparing to draw away, and hastened to clarify. “Not at you. At the bastards who hurt you. But never at you.”

A soft sigh was his only answer, and stillness the only action for a long time. Maybe he slept, or maybe he lay wide awake and watched the shadows chase each other across the dull canvas walls.



By morning he was again in charge and Duo was back to his old self. It worried Heero just a little that this was so; last night he had been upset, and so very frightened, that to see his normal cheerful manner was a bit unnerving. Could Duo really recover that quickly, or was he hiding? Why from Heero?

It was but one among many questions that Heero had no answers for -- questions that he was determined to resolve, before it was time for him to go. And if Duo could not give him his answers, Duo who was his key to human feelings, then he would find someone else who could.

He let his hand brush off of Duo’s shoulder as he settled him onto Quatre’s couch; Duo smiled up at him. Although the tent was smaller than Heero’s, it was filled with all the worldly possessions of two people in love and somehow seemed to burst with human feeling. Even if he wouldn’t admit it, Heero rather liked it -- the slightly exotic touches of Quatre’s things only served more to fascinate him.