... where did everyone go?

[windandwater]

Went to Circuit City and came back, as my ovaries are saying "RAAAAAAAAAAWR" very loudly and it's rather painful and sitracting. Currently munching on french bread pizza. I passed my parents on JFK, and later called them when I got to Circuit City, since someone called my cell but I didn't recognize the number.

Anyway, Circuit City FINALLY had the ink/paper cartridge thingies we need for the photo printer we have (got it with mom's digital camera), so I called to get the printer model number from her. Luckily, I managed to talk to a sales person since the rack was empty but the price label was still there. There were more of the ink/paper sets in another aisle and I snatched up the next to last one. Whoo! \o/ Also got 300 and the special postcards. Hahaha.

But once I got home, my parents were gone again. >_>;; Hmph.

Now I'm going to eat, digest, hope it doesn't all come back up, and then see if I can get on Trickster, since the wireless is working right now. Wish me luck.

Comments

[rosa-moschata.livejournal.com]

That can't be true. I've seen how the other boys look at you. Especially the one who looks like you.

[windup-boytoy.livejournal.com]

*shakes his head*

... if I wasn't here... if I'd never come back... who would miss me? No one would. I could... disappear and everyone would be happier. No one needs a thing like me around.

[rosa-moschata.livejournal.com]

But you did come back... Doesn't that make all the difference? You made a new life with them. I can't believe they wouldn't want you.

[windup-boytoy.livejournal.com]

... does it?

*buries his face against your chest, hiding away*

It doesn't matter. Nothing matters. They'll wake up and leave me behind. Everyone does.

[rosa-moschata.livejournal.com]

I think it does. If you hadn't come back, you wouldn't have had a chance of getting a family that loves you.

*runs his fingers through your hair, trying to keep you calm*

[windup-boytoy.livejournal.com]

... at least if I didn't come back, I'd be in Kingdom Hearts. At least I knew I belonged there. It felt warm and safe.

[rosa-moschata.livejournal.com]

But you did come back. You made friends, gained a family and people who love you. Don't you love them?

[windup-boytoy.livejournal.com]

... I can't lo-- I can't... do that. Feel it. Whatever.

*shakes a little bit*

I'm just a Fake.

[rosa-moschata.livejournal.com]

*squeezes you tighter, rubbing your back a little*

But you can feel other emotions, can't you? How do you know one of them isn't love? You feel real enough to me.

[windup-boytoy.livejournal.com]

... there's something... in here... *puts one hand on his chest, over his heart* It's hollow and empty. I can't feel it. It's all wrong.

I understood 'love' once, when I had Riku's Memories... but I can't touch that place anymore.

[rosa-moschata.livejournal.com]

....If you had Riku's Memories and felt it, that means it was still a part of you. Just because you had his Memories, it doesn't mean you were truly him. The love was yours. You just need to find a way to find it again.

[windup-boytoy.livejournal.com]

I'll find it once I'm Real. Once I'm Real, I'll understand everything.

[rosa-moschata.livejournal.com]

I wonder, if you truly need to be more Real than you already are. If you remembered the emotion, knew what it was, what's to say you can't reach it again?

[windup-boytoy.livejournal.com]

I've tried already. *hangs his head* I want to be able to lo-- do that. But I can't even say the word most of the time! Once I'm Real, I'll be able to do it.

[rosa-moschata.livejournal.com]

...what do you need, to become Real?

[windup-boytoy.livejournal.com]

I... I dunno. *tries to bury himself against your chest again, his hands clenching your shirt* I'll figure it out, and then I'll be Real. And I won't try and kill Riku this time to do it.

[rosa-moschata.livejournal.com]

*is quiet for a long moment, then murmurs softly in your ear*

If there's anything I can give to help, it's yours. No matter what it is.

[windup-boytoy.livejournal.com]

*he squeezes you tighter in response, shivering from the feel of your warm breath on his ear*

... just... hold me a little more.

[rosa-moschata.livejournal.com]

*that wasn't what he meant, but he's more than happy to give you that*

Alright. I just want you to know, though... I'd give you so much more. Just say the word and it's yours.

[windup-boytoy.livejournal.com]

*makes a little disbelieving noise as he snuggles more against you*

[rosa-moschata.livejournal.com]

*catches your hand in his and presses it over his Heart, wondering if you can feel it*

I mean it.

[windup-boytoy.livejournal.com]

*he does feel a steady thump thump and gives you a look*

No, you don't. You shouldn't. You need to get out more. There's better people out there than me.

[rosa-moschata.livejournal.com]

*just continues to give you that little smile, because you still don't seem to get it*

But no one else who I would do this for. Perhaps... Perhaps what Riku has that you do not... is a little bit of Light? You are completely Dark, are you not? Perhaps taking some of my Light and making it your own... It could work, couldn't it?

[windup-boytoy.livejournal.com]

*his eyes go wide and snatches his hand off your chest and leans back, looking ready to bolt*

DON'T! You can't do that! I won't let you! Riku tried it once and that's enough! The Light will kill me!

[rosa-moschata.livejournal.com]

*sighs, because he was really hoping that would work*

Then I suppose trading my Heart with yours won't work either.