Goodbye LJ...

[windandwater]

This is just to make it official for those who don't know, but I'm leaving LJ completely. For the rest of this week at least. Tomorrow is the Bar Exam and it runs for three days, so don't expect to see me about at all until Thursday night. Or even until the weekend since I plan on spending Thursday after the Bar drunk and crying. No online time for me at all. *whines* It will be hard, but I know I can do it.

So, because I'm a total h0r like that, I am declaring this to be a spam post. Go ahead. Run wild! Give me fics, give me links, give me pics, just babble to your heart's content and rape my inbox so I have something to see when I finally DO come back to the wonderful world of LJ. I don't even care if you write me a drabble and post it one word at a time. XD;

Though, I've tried to make a spam post before and it failed a bit miserably, so I don't have very high expectations this time around. Feel free to prove me wrong though!

♥

Comments

Re: Spoil of War, prologue

[mikkeneko.livejournal.com]

“You might be ready, but I’m not,” Duo snarled. “I won’t ever be what you want me to be, Hilde!”

“Don’t you understand?” she cried, frustrated. “I’m not afraid of you now, Duo! I’ve seen battle, I’ve seen death... Your Shinigami doesn’t scare me any more!”

He stared at her, as the last of the tremors shuddered their way out of his body. “No, Hilde, it’s you who doesn’t understand,” he said softly. “You’ve changed. You’re cold... hard... distant. You’re not my Poppet anymore.... you’re a soldier.”

“I think you need a soldier,” Hilde growled. “Even if you don’t like to admit it, Duo... death follows you around. D’you really think you’d be happy with a useless little frill who can’t even defend herself when Oz comes looking for you? D’you really think anyone but a soldier can handle the God of Death?”

“Hilde, please!” His own voice was breathless in his ears. “I’m not... I’m not who I used to be. I can’t be the boy I once was -- not even for you, Hilde!”

“Yes, you will!” she cried, furiously desperate. “You’re Duo, my Duo, nothing can change that! It... it will just take time, that’s all,” she said breathlessly. “When we’re alone together... away from all the fighting... that’s when you’ll start to get better. You’ll see. You’ll see!”

Duo took a deep breath and sighed, feeling the last of the dull anger draining away. He couldn’t keep letting her cling to her illusions. It was too much like lying. “Hilde... I can’t go with you.”

“What?” she cried, jerking away as if burned. “Why not?”

“I... I have to stay here,” he said, knowing it wasn’t enough. Hilde deserved to know why. “I have to stay with Heero.”

The look on her face hurt, truly hurt, and he had to close his eyes. “But why?” she demanded, her voice half disbelieving and half panicked.

The darkness behind his eyelids gave him his answer. “Because I love him,” he said, and the simple realization overwhelmed him with a sense of awe. He blinked his eyes open, surprised by his own words. “I love him.” It was just as wonderful to say the second time as it had been the first time.

“No, you don’t.”

Nothing could have shattered his expanding bubble of happiness so thoroughly as the calm certainty in her tone. He caught his breath, his eyes riveted to her face. “What?” His voice cracked.

“You don’t love him,” Hilde repeated easily. “You just think you do. Colonel Yuy has been very kind to take care of you so of course you’re grateful. I understand perfectly. But that’s not the same as love, don’t you see?” She smiled, a sweet, condescending smile that made Duo want to throw up as she closed the distance.