Hey.

[windandwater]

Someone amuse me.

Before I die of ennui.

Please.

Comments

[merith.livejournal.com]

duo: *pushes heero out on stage*

heero: *arms crossed and glaring*

duo: heero, you're supposed to do something.

heero: *glares at duo and tugs on the short skirt he's wearing* like...?

duo: dance?

heero: how 'bout i make you dance instead?

duo: *grins* uh... with or without clothes?

heero: *walks slowly toward duo* depends.

duo: *takes defensive steps back* on?

heero: bloodstains.

duo: eep! *runs*

Heero: *stops and looks at you* you like tap, jazz or improv?

*tells her Amestrian joke*

[mikkeneko.livejournal.com]

So a Xingian, An Ishvarite, and an alchemist all walk into a bar. They all sit down and they each order a mug of plain water.

The other two look at the Ishvarite and ask, "So what's up with this? Why come to a bar if you're going to order just water?"

And the Ishvarite answers, "We are forbidden by our God to drink the produce of wheat or grape, so I must make do with water."

So he turned to the Xingian and asks, "But what about you? You're not of my faith, why'd you order water?"

And the Xingian smiles, then reaches into his pocket and pulls out a little pouch. He shakes it into his water, and lo and behold, it turns into a mug of foaming beer.

"In my country, we have methods of changing plain water into beer. As long as I bring these with me, I never have to pay for beer, only for the water."

The alchemist snorts contemptuously and says, "That's nothing. Look at this!"And he stands up at the table, pulls down his pants, and pisses into his mug of water.

Then he draws an array on the table, puts the mug in it, and puts his hand next to it; there's a flash of light, and his mug is filled with foaming beer.

He sits down, and takes a huge gulp of beer without hesitation. The other two are so impressed, they have to toast him.

A little later on, when they're halfway through their cups, the Ishvarite gets around to asking the alchemist, "So what's this method you use to transmute beer out of plain water? Since it doesn't involve the produce of wheat or grapes, it wouldn't really be forbidden by my faith. I'd really like to know how you did it."

"Oh," said the alchemist, "It was easy. All I had to do was to use the array to switch the contents of my mug with his."

Re: *tells her Amestrian joke*

[samikitty.livejournal.com]

okay, mikke? *too* amusing.
LOL!!!

perfect for cheering me up on my lovely 13 hour workday. ^_~

(ps - sera, if you're reading this... litigation in big firms? duuuuull. a lot of work. too much work. but duuuullllllllll.)

my contribution! aka things for sera to ponder!

[samikitty.livejournal.com]

a) seeing as merith brought up skirts, well... no... not connected really, but seeing as mikke brought up FMA... has there been any consensus as to what's under Al's loincloth?

b) okay, we can go back to Heero in a skirt for a moment. ^_^ if Heero were to wear a skirt, do you think he'd go for schoolgirl pleats? a ruffly paris-hilton-mini? or a nice, sweet, knee-length a-line? would he wear pantyhose? would he be annoyed when the crotch of his pantyhose slid down to his knee-ish-region? do pantyhose have the same gun holding capacity as spandex?

c) wouldn't you *like* to write me a memo on constructive trusts as a remedy for breach of confidence/contract in land dealings? *biiiig-eyed innocent look*

[windandwater.livejournal.com]

... how about interpretive dance?

*gets a front row seat*

Re: *tells her Amestrian joke*

[windandwater.livejournal.com]

... XD!

I think I've seen this somewhere before, but it's still funny. Mostly because I think beer tastes like piss anyway.

Re: my contribution! aka things for sera to ponder!

[windandwater.livejournal.com]

a) I read a fic where there's an array on Al's crotch that, when activated, makes a nice cock for armor!sex.

b) I think Heero would go for schoolgirl pleats if it's for Duo. But not for everyday. I mini would be right out because it's a little too slutty, and hell to fight in. Maybe an A-line? And no pantyhose unless it's for a dressy occassion.

c) Sorry, not my field of specialty. :P

Re: my contribution! aka things for sera to ponder!

[merith.livejournal.com]

c) can we go back to heero in a skirt? that sounds much more fun!


b) schoolgirl for most everyday wear, with thighhighs or just above the ankle socks. and panties... prefers cotton, but there's nothing like silk. his gun goes in the little bitty purse he sometimes carries.

Re: my contribution! aka things for sera to ponder!

[windandwater.livejournal.com]

... cotton panties with little flowers printed on them. And he has a set of those "Days of the Week" panties because Duo likes them.

And everyone knows that the gun goes in the specially tailored strap in his camisole!