windandwater: (musefic)
[personal profile] windandwater
[Scene: the Sanctum]

Writer: [stares at a plump blue and purple bunny sitting on her desk. The bunny routinely flashes or changes size, sort of flickering like a bad flourescent light]

[Duo and Heero are standing in front of the desk. Duo looks worried and Heero looks... like Heero]

Writer: [seething] WHAT do you two think you're doing?

[the two Gboyz wince at the Wirter's tone]

Duo: [gulps] Uummm... breeding a bunny?

Writer: [slamming her hand down on the desk, which doesn't scare the bunny] NO! WRONG! What you're doing is driving me INSANE!

Heero: [snorts] You do that well enough by yourself.

Writer: [glares] Don't tempt me, Kamikaze Boy! I've got some nice fics in storage with your name written *all* over them!

Heero: [glares back] It's a valid bunny! You can't blame us for making your timelines work. It's our job as Muses. I don't see what's wrong with this bunny.

Writer: [incensed] What's *wrong* with this bunny is the fact that it's mostly SEX!

Duo: [blinking] So?

Writer: [goes into a fit]

Duo: [hands up and trying to placate] Hey, sex was never a problem before, right? You *read* the stuff and *enjoy* it! What's wrong with us wanting to get a dash of citrus thrown into the mix?

Writer: [picks up the bunny by the ears and hurls it at Duo, who dodges] DASH?! A DASH?! The whole freaking plot is centered around you trying to jump Heero's bones! This isn't a dash of citrus! It's the Florida groves!

Heero: [steps in before the Writer can leap across her desk and throttle Duo] It was my idea, Writer.

Writer: Don't you *dare* try to cover up for the braided nympho!

Heero: [standing up straighter, eye twitching] It *was* my idea! I'm the one who force the prequel idea through the queue. And I think it sets up the nature of our relationship for "Cowboy" and "Goodby to Never Never Land."

Writer: [eyes watering up and nearly sobbing] But the fic... it's... it's all about SEX!

Duo: Nope... it's about figuring out what you want and who you love.

Writer: [weeps] That's just semantics! You're seducing him through the whole fic! There's so many sex scenes here that my eyes are gonna fall out of my head if I write this!

Heero: It's still a valid fic.

Writer: I hate you two! I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU!!!

Duo: Nope. You love us to bits, which is why you've got a scene written down already.

Writer: [collapsing against her desk] I'm so Musewhipped that this isn't even funny. You two can go away now.

Duo: That's the smartest thing you've said all day!
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windandwater

February 2014

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