I couldn't listen any more. I couldn't believe any more; my vision of the other four pilots as my friends, as a family, was shattered. I had left them alone, innocently believing that they would continue to take care of each other -- that Duo would protect the hope of the three quiet soldiers in my absence, and they would protect his faith. But now everything had gone so horribly wrong -- Duo was dead, and his ghost was defiled with hatred towards the people who had done this to him. Towards the man I loved as my own heart, and the man I trusted as my brother. And Heero -- Allah, I didn't want to think about Heero. I didn't want to realize what he had done, when he had betrayed not only Duo, but his own soul. I had seen the spirit-rending injuries in Heero's mind when I touched him with my Spaceheart only days ago now, but I hadn't understood them. Now, I did -- I understood only too well. I had made the naive assumption that all I had to do was find Duo, the carefree and loving Duo I remembered, and all the rest of the problems would take care of themselves. Duo could heal me and Trowa and Wufei just by living, and he could save Heero through his love, and he could make everything all right. And now we had found Duo, but nothing could ever be right again. I heard a low keening fill the room, and barely recognized it as my own voice as the cocktail of Duo's rage and Trowa's guilt and my own miserable frustration bubbled up through my chest. I couldn't see, couldn't hear myself even as I jumped off of the couch and began shouting. "Stop it stop it STOP THIS NOW!" I screamed, unmindful of any consequences.
Duo's eyes widened, and his aim momentarily wavered between me and Wufei. Wufei was watching him closely, and in the moment of Duo's inattention, he sprang towards him, his hand going to his own pistol. Duo's gun immediately snapped back to Wufei and fired, once, twice. I watched, frozen in horror, as two explosions of red burst through the white fabric of Wufei's shirt; the Chinese pilot slammed back against the wall, then crumpled to the ground like a broken doll. The gun he had started to draw spun away from his nerveless hand and clattered to the floor.
A strangled croak of denial filled the air, and it took me a moment to realize that it came from my lover, not from me. Trowa broke out of his paralysis, and scrambled forward on his hands and knees, going for Wufei's gun. As though in slow motion, Duo's gun swung around to center on Trowa, and his finger tightened on the trigger. But I couldn't let that happen. I couldn't let that happen.
I moved faster than I ever thought possible, throwing myself between Trowa and the gun. I barely had time to wonder if I was going to die, and if it would be anything like Duo had described to me; just as the gun fired, Duo's arm jerked to the side, and the bullet hissed past me to embed itself in the wall of the room. Everyone froze; Trowa reaching for the gun, me in a protective half-crouch over him, and Duo with his gun trained on both of us.
Re: Torn 5
Date: 2006-02-21 11:24 am (UTC)I couldn't listen any more. I couldn't believe any more; my vision of the other four pilots as my friends, as a family, was shattered. I had left them alone, innocently believing that they would continue to take care of each other -- that Duo would protect the hope of the three quiet soldiers in my absence, and they would protect his faith. But now everything had gone so horribly wrong -- Duo was dead, and his ghost was defiled with hatred towards the people who had done this to him. Towards the man I loved as my own heart, and the man I trusted as my brother. And Heero -- Allah, I didn't want to think about Heero. I didn't want to realize what he had done, when he had betrayed not only Duo, but his own soul. I had seen the spirit-rending injuries in Heero's mind when I touched him with my Spaceheart only days ago now, but I hadn't understood them. Now, I did -- I understood only too well. I had made the naive assumption that all I had to do was find Duo, the carefree and loving Duo I remembered, and all the rest of the problems would take care of themselves. Duo could heal me and Trowa and Wufei just by living, and he could save Heero through his love, and he could make everything all right. And now we had found Duo, but nothing could ever be right again. I heard a low keening fill the room, and barely recognized it as my own voice as the cocktail of Duo's rage and Trowa's guilt and my own miserable frustration bubbled up through my chest. I couldn't see, couldn't hear myself even as I jumped off of the couch and began shouting. "Stop it stop it STOP THIS NOW!" I screamed, unmindful of any consequences.
Duo's eyes widened, and his aim momentarily wavered between me and Wufei. Wufei was watching him closely, and in the moment of Duo's inattention, he sprang towards him, his hand going to his own pistol. Duo's gun immediately snapped back to Wufei and fired, once, twice. I watched, frozen in horror, as two explosions of red burst through the white fabric of Wufei's shirt; the Chinese pilot slammed back against the wall, then crumpled to the ground like a broken doll. The gun he had started to draw spun away from his nerveless hand and clattered to the floor.
A strangled croak of denial filled the air, and it took me a moment to realize that it came from my lover, not from me. Trowa broke out of his paralysis, and scrambled forward on his hands and knees, going for Wufei's gun. As though in slow motion, Duo's gun swung around to center on Trowa, and his finger tightened on the trigger. But I couldn't let that happen. I couldn't let that happen.
I moved faster than I ever thought possible, throwing myself between Trowa and the gun. I barely had time to wonder if I was going to die, and if it would be anything like Duo had described to me; just as the gun fired, Duo's arm jerked to the side, and the bullet hissed past me to embed itself in the wall of the room. Everyone froze; Trowa reaching for the gun, me in a protective half-crouch over him, and Duo with his gun trained on both of us.