Naughty Fluffy Bunny

... You never thought of that before?? Yipes...

Dude, Faramir is Emo all the way.

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;__; He even has bad poetry.

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Hahahaha! Yeah, Aragorn is angsty, but Faramir... oh god. He looks like he's going to break into tears in like, every scene! You almost want him to die and be put out of his misery!

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No, I don't! I love Faramir! And Boromir! HUZZAH FOR THE MEN OF GONDOR!

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You'd kick a perfectly happy puppy, but you wouldn't put Faramir out of his misery?

Besides, he's lonely without Boromir. XD

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I have NEVER kicked a puppy. And Faramir begs you to cuddle and huggle and pet him. Then tie him to a bed and have Boromir ravish him.

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What, no hobbit!sex for Faramir??

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Yes, you only kick pigeons.

*cuddles Faramir*

*whispers* Quick, Sera, go get Boromir and the rope now...

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O_O

*scurries back with Boromir in tow*

Boromir: Gondor has no pants. Gondor needs no pants.

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*whimpers* But but but! 'Mir brothercest!

They can have a threesome with Frodo.

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*cackles evilly* Yes! Now let the tying up of Faramir commence!

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Boromir: Alas, brother, that you have come to this! Such drab clothing and curious glass which covers thine eyes! Look! Look upon and know me!

Emo!Faramir: I want to die.

Boromir: *weeps in a manly way*

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Sam'll kim 'em.

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We'll give him Rosie and he'll settle down.

<.<
>.>

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Emo!Faramir: *turns away as he is filled with unspeakable amounts of angst that he has made his brother cry*

Boromir: *puts arm around Emo!Faramir and clutches him firmly* Come now, brother, you would turn from me, but not I from you, for I love you still, despite your dark attire and darker mood.

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Ya know, I don't think that threesome with Frodo is a good idea, as he seems to be a very virile hobbit and Faramir might end up with child. :x

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*clears throat*

Rosie you're alright,
You wear my ring
When you hold me tight
Rosie, that's my thing

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Funny, in the fics I read, it's Frodo who gets knocked up. Ah! The angst! Whose child is it? Boromir's? Faramir's?

Is it... GANDALF'S?!

*shockaweamazement*

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There you go. Sam'll be happy either way.

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Emo!Faramir: Truly, brother? You would not turn away from me, even as I recite my flowery poetry concerning the trauma our father has inflicted on me, and the torturous love I bear for you?

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Did you not trainwreck on that link to the Faramir mpreg posted on ithilien_night the other day?

I did. I have not yet recovered.

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Boromir: *clenches jaw to steel himself* Nay, I would remain by your side, a willing ear, and listen to all your crap... err I mean, deep and thoughtful verse.

Emo!Faramir: *eyes well up and begins to open his mouth*

Boromir: *quickly before Emo!Faramir can say anything* Still, I would not trouble you, for surely there are better times than this. Let us to the bed where we may have hot weaselsex for the rest of the night.

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I... avoided that fic. I'd seen it around before, off Barudin's rec list, I think. preggy!Faramir doesn't do it for me... though I've read a few preggy!Frodos. The thought of a small, rounded hobbit with food cravings amuses me to no end.

X3

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*keeps secret desire for Fa/B mpreg to self.*

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Emo!Faramir: In your arms, my brother, I feel that I would not need of my somber clothing. Help divest me of it.

Boromir: *eagerly complies*

... bow chicka wow wow...

Boromir: *surprised* Brother, what devilry is this?

PornStar!Faramir: Brother... I have better things you can do with that mouth besides talk. *tackles Boromir to the bed*

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Oh! Well, THAT'S different! I just don't like Faramir preggers with FRODO'S child.

XP Just call me fickle.

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UkePornStar!Boromir: *blushing* I thought I was the big brother around here! Teehee.

(*snogs you* You make me laughs. And now I have to go into town. Wah. *bites you* I'm writing bad Fa/B for you when I get home.)

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