"Tell me, Duo, is there anything on this colony that you cherish? Anything that you like for more reason than ‘it isn't so bad?' It isn't, I'll grant you that, it isn't so bad. But it isn't so great, either. Why are you making do with less than you could have? Why are you settling for less than you deserve?"
He ran down, then, and wished he had run down earlier. Duo, face blank, was staring out the colony window. His hands were tight in his lap. Heero felt panic threatening to take him over, but he pushed it back, forging on with his speech. "You asked where else you could go. How about this. Move to L1. Start over there, no bad memories, no past obligations. They're underemployed right now, you could get a job anywhere, doing anything you wanted. And... if you wanted..."
Heero took a deep breath. His heart was accelerating, his hands shaking as he approached this last. "If... if you wanted... I can find an apartment... and you could come and live with me... permanently."
There. Done. It was said. Heero's vision went almost white for a moment, before he got his shaking body under control. He swallowed, and looked over at Duo, trying to see how his lover would take it.
At least he wasn't torturing the sheet any more, and his face had some expression. But it wasn't the expression Heero wanted; he looked pinched and worried, as though torn between two enormous pressures. "Heero..." he started, then stopped. He sighed. "Heero, look, I appreciate everything you just said, and I... but... but... can I have a little while alone to think? That's an awfully big decision, and I just want a little bit... to think about it, ‘k?"
Heero swallowed, against the sinking sensation of dread, and nodded. "I'll just... move out... to the other room."
With shaking hands, he picked up the tray and dishes, and forced a calmness on his expression that he didn't really feel.
Out in the living room/kitchen, he dropped the tray onto the counter, then went and sank onto the couch. It was foolish of him, he supposed, to think that Duo would immediately jump on his offer. After all that he'd hurt the other boy, what made him think that Duo would ever want to marry him?
Re: Destination
Date: 2006-02-22 09:16 am (UTC)"Tell me, Duo, is there anything on this colony that you cherish? Anything that you like for more reason than ‘it isn't so bad?' It isn't, I'll grant you that, it isn't so bad. But it isn't so great, either. Why are you making do with less than you could have? Why are you settling for less than you deserve?"
He ran down, then, and wished he had run down earlier. Duo, face blank, was staring out the colony window. His hands were tight in his lap. Heero felt panic threatening to take him over, but he pushed it back, forging on with his speech. "You asked where else you could go. How about this. Move to L1. Start over there, no bad memories, no past obligations. They're underemployed right now, you could get a job anywhere, doing anything you wanted. And... if you wanted..."
Heero took a deep breath. His heart was accelerating, his hands shaking as he approached this last. "If... if you wanted... I can find an apartment... and you could come and live with me... permanently."
There. Done. It was said. Heero's vision went almost white for a moment, before he got his shaking body under control. He swallowed, and looked over at Duo, trying to see how his lover would take it.
At least he wasn't torturing the sheet any more, and his face had some expression. But it wasn't the expression Heero wanted; he looked pinched and worried, as though torn between two enormous pressures. "Heero..." he started, then stopped. He sighed. "Heero, look, I appreciate everything you just said, and I... but... but... can I have a little while alone to think? That's an awfully big decision, and I just want a little bit... to think about it, ‘k?"
Heero swallowed, against the sinking sensation of dread, and nodded. "I'll just... move out... to the other room."
With shaking hands, he picked up the tray and dishes, and forced a calmness on his expression that he didn't really feel.
Out in the living room/kitchen, he dropped the tray onto the counter, then went and sank onto the couch. It was foolish of him, he supposed, to think that Duo would immediately jump on his offer. After all that he'd hurt the other boy, what made him think that Duo would ever want to marry him?